Prayer is a Weapon...And a Choice.

Yesterday morning I read that great article on prayer and posted it here.  I was so encouraged! I was reminded of how very powerful prayer truly is and was inspired to begin to wield this weapon I've been so freely given and yet use so rarely.

And, I did pray more yesterday than I have on other days.  I found myself praying about all kinds of things throughout my day.  I prayed for my roomate's car as she took it to the shop, I found myself praying for the staff of the church I attend, I prayed for a friend who is a sophomore in college and just beginning to realize how very big the world is and was feeling a bit overwhelmed by it all, I prayed for grace and favor to be with another friend who is trying to manage his finances well to be able to do all the things God's put on his heart to do (like return to Cambodia this summer!)....Okay, so I prayed more yesterday than I have on other days (mind you, all these prayers were quite sporadic during the day-each one lasting anywhere from about 4-7 minutes....don't think I was like spending hours upon hours with God...which would have been great but, maybe that'll happen another day).

Then, last night at about 8:00 which is 9:00am in Cambodia my mind drifted to Phnom Penh and Svay Pak.  This is very common, I often wonder about what my friends are doing on the other side of the world.  And, thanks to technology, one of my American teammates in Cambodia was online and we began chatting on Facebook.  I really enjoy being able to connect with her so frequently, it helps me to stay in the loop with what's happening there and it's a great outlet for the both of us as we struggle with things that only those who've been there and experienced firsthand can relate to.

Earlier that morning I'd read an email update from another teammate.  Because it was sent out en mass the details of some stories were vague.  I began to ask questions about a situation that was described in the update.  My friend proceeded to confirm the truth of a situation we'd all been desperately hoping was not reality. Turns out that two of our youngest kids from the Wat Phnom ministry are indeed being sold nightly.  They are both boys, a 6-year old and a 4-year old.

A 4-year old boy who, even when we do have enough evidence and can catch the bad guy, HAS NO PLACE TO GO.  There is not a safe place for boys in Phnom Penh, let alone one where the eternal hope and healing of Jesus is offered.  Yet....

There is not a safe place for boys in Cambodia yet.  There will be because God has given us (the Hard Places Community) His dream for a place of refuge for little ones like this boy and the many others whose stories are very similar to his.  TraffickJam2011 has a mighty purpose in fulfilling this dream....And, I'm excited to see how He will provide!

But, last night and this morning I find myself with a truly broken heart (again).  I wept so hard last night, my stomach hurt and I was so angry at the evil of this fallen world.  Then I remembered about the weapon I've been given....and I was faced with such a clear choice: would I choose to believe that prayer was no match for this horrid situation that is only one of millions and be overcome by despair and hopelessness? Or, would I choose to bravely use what I've been given, knowing that it is prayer that ultimately moves heaven and earth?...not simply my words but my words being added to the power of the One who hears my pleas, the One whose heart is broken so much more than mine will ever be?  Would I belive that if I pray, if I choose to let my prayers rise to His throne with the countless other prayers that surely flood that place on behalf of the same issue, that He would hear and that things will change?

Yikes.  Big decision.  I chose to pray....I prayed through my tears, I cried, I yelled, I was angry, I was hurting. But, I went to my King, the One who has true power and authority in this world. And, I believe that He heard me and I trust that He knows best. His word tells me so; "For My thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are My ways your ways," declares the Lord. "As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are My ways higher than your ways and My thoughts than your thoughts."-Isaiah 55:8-9.

Sometimes I want to stop feeling, I want to pretend that the little ones He's allowed to know and love in Cambodia are just fine, to not read the updates from teamates....But, my God promises to honor the sacrifice of a broken heart...so I'll continue to seek His heart and walk with Him...Psalm 51:15-17 "O Lord, open my lips, and my mouth will declare Your praise. You don't delight in sacrifice or I'd bring it; You don't delight in burnt offerings.  The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit; a broken and contrite heart, O God, you won't despise."

Today, I'll choose to pray.....because it's what I can do right here, right now.