It's almost 11pm on Christmas night here in Phnom Penh, Cambodia and it has been a very sweet day... i spent about an hour with Jesus first thing this morning followed by a quick and cherished video chat with one of my younger brothers in New York, then my roommate, and I had cinnamon rolls (a true luxury of imported goodness!) and coffee while we opened gifts that her parents had left for us after their visit a few weeks ago and the grand finale of the morning was when we had BACON with breakfast (and eggs and grits....but, seriously, compared to BACON they're not really worth mentioning)!!! I got a phone call from my brother in the middle of his super busy day just to say, "hey, merry Christmas!" Then I spent the afternoon and evening with a missionary family here who will be leaving in July and we watched Christmas movies, some Jimmy Fallon clips and just enjoyed each others company and air conditioning. And, just before I sat down to type, I accomplished washing two sinks full of dishes (and I'm feeling quite victorious about that one!). A very sweet, joyful day...
Such a glaring contrast from how Christmas was spent when i was a child.... Back then I was surrounded by people who didn't know Jesus, didn't value family moments and couldn't seem to get through a holiday without some sort of domestic violence... I came to dread most major holidays because I knew they meant upheaval at home and school was closed which meant no place of refuge.
But, this year? I'm kind of, a bit, shocked at how the day went.... I wasn't looking for such a sweet day. I didn't pray for it, didn't try very hard to make something happen but yet it all did happen... God gave me gifts that went straight to my heart... Gifts like time with Jesus, a video call with a brother I haven't seen in years, gifts were peacefully opened, there was yummy food and coffee, I received a phone call from my brother here in Cambodia in the middle of his super busy day just because he wanted to call, I spent time with friends that was filled with laughter even as we talked about the "crazy" that was Christmas during our childhoods...
God gives such good gifts because He knows our hearts!!! He delights in giving us exactly what He knows we desire even when we aren't sure what we desire...
And, this year I even found myself enjoying some of the things I thought I'd never really enjoy. The preparation, the build up of the Christmas season....I enjoyed it, found things about it that brought me life and delight! A fresh pine tree scented candle, the purchase of a Christmas tree that is taller than me, decorating that tree, wrapping gifts for friends, teaching about advent, watching Christmas movies with friends throughout December... I found myself excited instead of anxious and I really like that contrast.
Christmas is one of my favorite holidays (along with Easter and my birthday...). For me, it's the celebration of God choosing relationship and that means so, so, so MUCH to me. I am one of the most relational people, always choosing people over task and learning to appreciate the ones around me who can help me reach goals! A few months ago I wrote a blog About how much i treasure relationship....
Jesus is God, He always has been and always will be. He has always had the power for victory over sin and death. But, the way He chose to use and display that power, that's what I love about Christmas! He chose to come as one of us, to experience what we experience in this fallen world, to know our emotions.... He chose to put Himself in a position of dependence as an infant. He chose to endure pain and sickness (these things are not sin but the result of sin in this world and I believe Jesus experienced them as we do). Because He came as a human, because of Christmas, I have a God, a Savior, who knows what I feel because He chose humility... I LOVE Christmas because in it I am convinced that Jesus wants to know my heart, that He can handle anything that comes at us together, there is nothing He hasn't felt already so I don't need to feel alone... He knows me.... And, even with all of His knowledge of the poor choices I'll make, the moments I'll let my feelings speak louder than His truth, the times I'll forget His love for me, even in all of this He still chose to come at Christmas as a baby, just like one of us... His love is too great for me to comprehend.
I'm so glad that because God created me with such high value for relationship, for being known,Christmas has become one of my favorites. I love celebrating that I have a Savior who understands me and wants to know me, it truly is an amazing gift to have been given by God.
Such a glaring contrast from how Christmas was spent when i was a child.... Back then I was surrounded by people who didn't know Jesus, didn't value family moments and couldn't seem to get through a holiday without some sort of domestic violence... I came to dread most major holidays because I knew they meant upheaval at home and school was closed which meant no place of refuge.
But, this year? I'm kind of, a bit, shocked at how the day went.... I wasn't looking for such a sweet day. I didn't pray for it, didn't try very hard to make something happen but yet it all did happen... God gave me gifts that went straight to my heart... Gifts like time with Jesus, a video call with a brother I haven't seen in years, gifts were peacefully opened, there was yummy food and coffee, I received a phone call from my brother here in Cambodia in the middle of his super busy day just because he wanted to call, I spent time with friends that was filled with laughter even as we talked about the "crazy" that was Christmas during our childhoods...
God gives such good gifts because He knows our hearts!!! He delights in giving us exactly what He knows we desire even when we aren't sure what we desire...
And, this year I even found myself enjoying some of the things I thought I'd never really enjoy. The preparation, the build up of the Christmas season....I enjoyed it, found things about it that brought me life and delight! A fresh pine tree scented candle, the purchase of a Christmas tree that is taller than me, decorating that tree, wrapping gifts for friends, teaching about advent, watching Christmas movies with friends throughout December... I found myself excited instead of anxious and I really like that contrast.
Christmas is one of my favorite holidays (along with Easter and my birthday...). For me, it's the celebration of God choosing relationship and that means so, so, so MUCH to me. I am one of the most relational people, always choosing people over task and learning to appreciate the ones around me who can help me reach goals! A few months ago I wrote a blog About how much i treasure relationship....
Jesus is God, He always has been and always will be. He has always had the power for victory over sin and death. But, the way He chose to use and display that power, that's what I love about Christmas! He chose to come as one of us, to experience what we experience in this fallen world, to know our emotions.... He chose to put Himself in a position of dependence as an infant. He chose to endure pain and sickness (these things are not sin but the result of sin in this world and I believe Jesus experienced them as we do). Because He came as a human, because of Christmas, I have a God, a Savior, who knows what I feel because He chose humility... I LOVE Christmas because in it I am convinced that Jesus wants to know my heart, that He can handle anything that comes at us together, there is nothing He hasn't felt already so I don't need to feel alone... He knows me.... And, even with all of His knowledge of the poor choices I'll make, the moments I'll let my feelings speak louder than His truth, the times I'll forget His love for me, even in all of this He still chose to come at Christmas as a baby, just like one of us... His love is too great for me to comprehend.
